In this life..

I'm a woman. In my next life I'd like to come back as a bear.
When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but
sleep for six months, conserving your energy.

I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself into a stupor.

I could deal with that too!

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs.

I could deal with that.

If you're mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.

I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, gonna be a bear!